‘I tried to kill her’: Pamela Anderson reveals disturbing details of sexual abuse in Netflix’s ‘Pamela, a love story’

Trigger Warning: This story contains disturbing details about sexual abuse, rape, and assault. If you or your loved ones are experiencing difficulties, contact the National Sexual Assault Hotline. Call 1-800-656-HOPE or visit https://www.rainn.org

Pamela Anderson takes us back to her hometown of Ladysmith, BC for the intimate Netflix documentary. Pamela, a love story (premiere on January 31).

The internationally renowned Canadian Playboy model and actress reflects on her life, most of all, in her own words, largely through what she has written in her personal journals.

“I’m not a victim,” Anderson says in the documentary. “I put myself in crazy situations and survived.”

When most people think of Anderson, the first thing that probably comes to mind is Baywatch and the star’s whirlwind romance with Mötley Crüe’s Tommy Lee, including the stolen personal tapes that became the first true viral video.

But what led up to that moment, and how do you look back on that moment in your life? Numerous stories have been written about the sex tape scandal, the Hulu series. pam and tommy recreates the events for entertainment, but in Pamela, a love storyAnderson gives us his honest thoughts on this remarkable moment in pop culture history.

Revealed traumatic moments of the childhood of Pamela Anderson

Before reaching that moment, Pamela, a love story Director Ryan White begins the film by looking at Anderson’s upbringing in Canada, on Vancouver Island.

But it doesn’t take long for the movie to get to some shocking details about her life, including a babysitter who abused her as a child for years.

“I tried to kill her,” Anderson says. “I tried to stab her through the heart with a candy cane and then I told her that she wanted her to die, and she died in a car accident the next day.”

Anderson never told anyone about this abuse, thinking that it had somehow caused the babysitter’s death.

When she was a little older, 12, Anderson’s friend had a crush on a much older boy. One night, her friend was with hers in love with her, leaving Anderson alone with a 25-year-old man, who raped her.

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Once again, she didn’t tell anyone. Particularly as Anderson’s mother had been dealing with issues with her husband at the time, but Anderson reveals in the documentary that she felt she “was tattooed on her forehead” that this had happened.

It’s those events from Anderson’s childhood that made her feel “ashamed” of her body.

That may seem strange to some, given that Anderson is one of the most famous Playboy models in history, but like many women, she lived with insecurity about her body, and her work at Playboy actually made her feel more empowered.

‘You’re in Playboy, you have no right to privacy’

There is a central message in Pamela, a love story that’s critical for society to understand, after we’ve failed so miserably in the way we relate to celebrities, particularly women. Just because someone, like Anderson, is in Baywatch running on a beach in a bathing suit, and your body is on display modeling for Playboy, doesn’t mean you don’t deserve privacy or respect.

For example, the documentary shows a series of clips where interviewers refer to her breasts and ask about her implants.

“I think it’s kind of inappropriate to ask women those kinds of questions,” Anderson says. “There has to be some line that people don’t cross.”

That concept is even more egregiously misconstrued when it comes to her horrifying statement in the ’90s related to the release and distribution of her “sex tape” with then-husband Tommy Lee, created using personal video footage stolen from the couple’s home. .

“I didn’t know I was going to be completely humiliated…all these guys in there, they had nude pictures of me,” Anderson recalls in the documentary. “The lawyers basically said, ‘You’re in Playboy, you have no right to privacy,’ and that was a bit of a shock.”

In Anderson’s words, this kind of questioning and judgment “felt like a violation.”

“I don’t want to bring up something really heavy from my childhood, but when I was attacked by this guy, I thought everyone would know,” she explains in the film. “When the tape was stolen, it felt like that and the statements were so brutal.”

“I remember seeing them thinking… ‘Why do these grown men hate me so much?’”

With the advent of the internet, this footage was shared around the world in an instant. The model/actress later described her professional persona as more of a “cartoon” from then on, forever linked to this stolen footage.

“I knew at that moment that my career was over,” she says.

“I blocked him from my life, I had to do it to survive”

That leads to the launch of the series. pam and tommy last year, depicting a version of the “sex tape” scandal on Anderson’s life, but notably executed without her consent.

“They should have had to have my permission,” she says in Pamela, a love story. The star goes on to say that when she talked to her ex-husband about it, he told her not to let him “hurt” her like last time.

At one point in the documentary, Anderson receives a call from his son Brandon Thomas Lee (also a producer of Pamela, a love story) after watching the first three episodes of the Hulu series. He tells his mom that the setup of the show gives Seth Rogan’s character, Rand Gauthier, a reason to steal the tapes, because his dad was a “jerk” who didn’t pay for the renovation job. his house.

“I blocked that out of my life, I had to do it to survive,” Anderson says, adding that she “feels sick” when it comes up again.

Documenting her life from childhood to her Broadway debut in chicago last year, Pamela, a love story It’s really essential to watch so that everyone understands the consequences of this rather toxic way we consume celebrity content.

The fact that they have a public persona and achieve a level of fame does not mean that these people and their bodies are, as Anderson puts it, “the property of the world.”